If a man experiences the pregnancy of his wife, experiencing the same sensations as his wife, this is not love, but a hysterical neurosis, which is called "kuwad syndrome". Valery Marilov, professor of the Department of Psychiatry and Medical Psychology at the Peoples' Friendship University of Russia, who has been observing patients with this disorder for 15 years, spoke about this disease in an interview with Medical Newspaper.

- What is couvade syndrome?

The term used in the name of the disease comes from the French verb couver, which means "to hatch chicks." Couvade syndrome refers to a combination of psychogenic and psychosomatic disorders in young men who have pregnant wives. The clinic of pathological sensations of a young husband corresponds to what happens to his wife, who is expecting a child. If her appetite changes, her whole eating behavior changes, and the woman begins to eat inedible food, then her husband suffers the same. He feels the same pain that his wife experiences, for example, when the pelvic bones separate.

The main symptoms of the disease include: morning weakness, decrease, perversion or increase in appetite, almost daily nausea and vomiting - sometimes on an empty stomach, sometimes at the sight or smell of a particular food, frequent constipation or, conversely, diarrhea, stomach or intestinal colic, pain in the lower abdomen, which sometimes, in character and intensity, can even imitate an attack of appendicitis, pain in the lumbar region, psychogenic toothache, as well as the so-called pains of empathy or pains of sympathy. The latter are expressed in the fact that in the husband the sensation is localized in the same organ as in his pregnant wife.

These symptoms are accompanied by emotional instability, increased irritability, depression, internal tension, insomnia, capriciousness, extreme egocentrism, intolerance, rejection of other points of view on a particular problem. Interestingly, the capriciousness of men with couvade syndrome far exceeds the "frivolity of desires" of actually pregnant women. Most often in this syndrome, the imitation of pregnancy discomfort refers to the digestive system, although the variations in relation to the involvement of one or another organ can be the widest. Not surprisingly, these men are sent to an infectious diseases or surgical clinic with suspected various diseases.

In the process of studying psychosomatic diseases of the gastrointestinal tract, we identified 9 cases of the classic couvade syndrome. They were initially misinterpreted as gastralgia or irritable bowel syndrome. Only a careful targeted history, as well as a chronological coincidence of symptoms in men with the corresponding manifestations in their pregnant wives, made it possible to exclude these diagnoses and stop at the diagnosis of couvade syndrome.

- When does the future father notice manifestations of this unusual disease?

As a rule, in the third month of the wife's pregnancy, and they reach their peak by the ninth month. When childbirth occurs, the sensations in men are even more aggravated. Sometimes two discrete peaks are noted - at the third and ninth months with a relative reduction in symptoms between them. In a third of patients, the symptoms of the syndrome debut violently, but by the time of delivery it can completely disappear, in a third it disappears only after the birth of the child, gradually disappearing as the ruptures heal in puerperas and other postpartum complications stop. The severity of a man's condition depends on what he thinks about the birth of his wife. If he presents them with horror, then this horror will be experienced. A man constantly calls the maternity hospital, he will not calm down until he is told that everything is fine, his wife has a son or daughter. After that, dad's pain immediately stops. My wife's childbirth is over, and so is his!

- What underlies the formation of the couvade syndrome?

First of all, unconscious anxiety for the fate of his wife and unborn child and, to a certain extent, a kind of guilt towards his wife. Some psychoanalysts believe that a false pregnancy in a man is often a manifestation of his identification with his mother to atone for guilt before her. The kuvad syndrome is also associated with the ritual of the same name among some nationalities, in which the husband lies down in bed during the birth of his wife, refuses to eat, imitates childbirth with screams and various body movements, taking part of the pain on himself. This ritual was often used by medieval sorceresses, who transferred the pain of their wife to their husband, for which they quite often fell on the fire of the Inquisition. As for the anthropological significance of such a ritual, here the interpretation is very different - from the presence of reduced female reproductive organs in men to a kind of symbolic struggle against matriarchy. Couvade syndrome was described several centuries ago. According to foreign studies, 11% of men of childbearing age experienced this condition to some extent during their wife's pregnancy, that is, every ninth of the future fathers had couvade syndrome. Individual symptoms of this pathology are even more common. For example, in the USA, an abdominal variant of the kuvad syndrome was detected in 40% of the surveyed men with pregnant wives.

- Which men are prone to this disease?

All the patients we observed were young people aged 21 to 27 who were in their first marriage and were expecting an addition to the family. One young man already had a child, and during his wife's first pregnancy, he also had manifestations of the couvade syndrome. The personality of all observed patients was of an infantile-hysterical warehouse with a high level of unregulated anxiety and a well-developed mechanism of psychological transference. That is why the discomfort of the wife's pregnancy was transferred in the form of symptoms of the kuwad syndrome to the husband, and this transfer was fueled by a huge, but unconscious sense of guilt towards the wife. It is characteristic that all these men were brought up in purely matriarchal families, where the role of the father was reduced only to the function of procreation. The family was dominated and dictated by an imperious and decisive mother, a kind of Kabanikha, who did not even give an external possibility of the right to choose. In their assessments of certain circumstances, future patients were always focused only on the mother and did not even consider other options. They also married at the choice of their mother, while their wives in personal terms were almost copies of their mothers. Therefore, the patients themselves in the family have always been on the sidelines, not even allowing the thought of possible leadership.

All patients had one or another sexual disorder, mainly in the form of premature ejaculation, which caused them a certain inferiority complex. In one young man, among other things, emotional sensitivity, tearfulness, pain in the lower abdomen and heaviness in the lower back were present before the wife's pregnancy, coinciding chronologically with her premenstrual days (these phenomena were noted by the husband for 6 months before the wife's pregnancy). Such a “menstrual variant” of the kuvad syndrome has not yet been described in the literature. The mechanism of its appearance, like that of the typical couvade syndrome, seems to be analogous to hysterical transference, similar to the pains of sympathy mentioned above.

- Give, please, any specific example from your clinical observations.

Patient O., aged 26, teacher of Russian language and literature by education. Married since 20 years. Heredity is not burdened. The only child in the family. Raised by his mother and grandmother, his father left the family when the child was 4 months old. Characterologically, the mother is a personality of a hysteroepileptoid warehouse, always very emotional, at the same time imperious to the point of cruelty and demanding to the point of pedantry. From childhood, the patient lived according to her laws, unquestioningly followed all her instructions and requirements, sacredly believed her in everything. Until now, he believes that it is sacrilege to doubt what his mother said. At the request of his mother, he entered the Pedagogical Institute, although he did not like his future specialty. In his third year, he married for love, but before that, for a year, he met a girl almost always in the presence of his mother. The bride and future mother-in-law got along well, and such a striking resemblance of both women allowed the patient to avoid the conflicts typical of such cases.

After the wedding, the patient discovered that his wife, like his mother, takes care of him like a big child, and she solves all problems herself, showing enviable determination, perseverance and perseverance. The wife suffered from frigidity, so her husband's premature ejaculation suited her perfectly, for which our patient simply idolized her. When she became pregnant, her husband received this news with great anxiety. The wife's pregnancy was difficult: from the first days, nausea, vomiting, lack of appetite, and pain in the stomach area were noted. In the fourth month of her pregnancy, her husband suddenly developed nausea and vomiting in the morning, followed by stomach pain. The patient decided that he had a peptic ulcer of the stomach or duodenum. He was examined by gastroenterologists, did a gastroscopy, but no pathology was revealed. Doctors suggested that the disorder that had arisen was due to nerves, and they advised me to drink tinctures of motherwort and valerian. Symptoms have eased somewhat. Later, the patient reported that his then condition was entirely determined by the well-being of his wife. At the same time, everything that the wife felt, our patient experienced to a much greater extent. If the wife had a single vomiting, then the husband had it indomitable and often lasted several hours. He was forced to see a therapist who diagnosed him with food poisoning and recommended hospitalization in an infectious diseases hospital. The man's appetite was constantly absent, he often felt sick and vomited, and during his wife's pregnancy he lost 11 kg.

When the wife began prenatal contractions and the amniotic fluid broke before his eyes, after which the woman was taken to the maternity hospital, the kuvad syndrome in the future father reached the limit. He rushed about the apartment in horror. It was at this moment that he first felt involuntary urination, after which there was a sharp sharp pain in the lower abdomen, so severe that, as he said, "he took his breath away." With suspicion of acute appendicitis, the patient was sent to a surgical hospital, from where he was released two hours later due to the absence of any surgical pathology and the disappearance of pain. But at home, this pain resumed and persisted until the man found out that his son was born. Five years later, our patient's wife became pregnant again, and again, in the fourth month of her pregnancy, he began to experience first morning sickness, then nausea, vomiting, and stomach pains. However, this time he already understood a certain connection between his wife's experiences and his feelings, so he regularly visited a psychotherapist and took tranquilizers and antipsychotics prescribed to him. Before the birth of his wife, the patient doubled the dose of the drugs taken and experienced only a slight pain in the lower abdomen.

In this case, we were diagnosed with hysterical neurosis. It followed from the presence of a specific psycho-traumatic situation caused by the wife's pregnancy, from the trigger mechanism of the unconscious phenomenon of psychological transference and neurotic symptoms of the hysterical circle. Characteristically, this psychological transfer turned out to be not only sufficiently complete, but also excessive. With the resolution of the traumatic situation (successful birth of the wife), all the symptoms completely disappeared.

- What to do with such patients?

Relieve inner tension. Everything comes from the head. Of course, in such a situation there is a positive point - to take part of the wife's pain on yourself, but otherwise ... In the West, a woman often gives birth in the presence of her husband, this is already practiced in our country. And if a young person has kuvad syndrome? I think that the husbands of women in labor should definitely be examined, because the men themselves will not turn to a psychiatrist, they do not consider themselves mentally ill.

Such a person needs to be prescribed sedatives and recommend psychotherapy, which consists in the main thing: explanation, explanation and once again explanation. Unfortunately, our doctors are still unfamiliar with such an unusual disease as couvade syndrome, which, in my opinion, is now necessary to know not only psychiatrists, but also surgeons, infectious disease specialists, obstetricians and gynecologists.

Imagine this situation: You became pregnant and told the father of the child about this wonderful news, but he had two feelings. On the one hand, the future father was very happy, and on the other hand, he was very upset. After some time, you notice in your chosen one the same symptoms as you. He is sick, drawn to salty, his mood often changes. Do not worry - perhaps the future dad has "kuvad syndrome".

Kuvad syndrome, or "false pregnancy" is a mental illness. Usually, "false pregnancy" occurs in dads under 30 who are expecting their first child. It happens that the syndrome manifests itself in young fathers who are expecting a second child.

Couvade syndrome susceptible unbalanced, nervous and hysterical men . It is difficult for such men to restrain their emotions, because of the slightest failure they start to panic and, as a result, depression. In addition, "false pregnancy" often manifests itself in those men who do not occupy a leading position in the family, but are "under the heel" of their wife. Men who have "false pregnancy" syndrome often have sexual deviations. Frequent ejaculation or erectile dysfunction is an example.

The most common symptoms of couvade syndrome are 3-4 months pregnant wife . The next stage occurs at the end of pregnancy, i.e. for 9 months . Next to such a man it is very difficult for a pregnant girl, because he is not able to go shopping, help you around the house and support you in difficult times. As a rule, if a man suddenly manifests couvade syndrome, a woman, on the contrary, feels almost no signs of pregnancy, since she has to take care of her “pregnant husband”.

Physiological symptoms of a future dad's false pregnancy include:

• Flatulence;
• Nausea and vomiting;
• Heartburn and indigestion;
• lumbar pain;
• Decreased appetite;
• Toxicosis;
• Cramps of the limbs;
• toothache;
• Irritation of the genitals and urinary tract.

Mental symptoms include the following:

• Insomnia;
• Unfounded fear;
• Frequent mood swings;
• Apathy;
• Prostration;
• lethargy;
• Irritability;
• Anxiety, etc.

spouse can repeat the behavior of his pregnant wife . Pain in the abdomen and lower back with kuvad syndrome is exactly the same as with contractions. During the period of increase in the abdomen of the spouse, the man may feel the divergence of the pelvic bones. If the spouse is afraid of childbirth, the “pregnant spouse” will also worry and worry, and possibly hysteria. This will be especially acute at the approach of childbirth .

Rarely, Kuvad syndrome lasts the entire pregnancy, until the very birth. At the same time, the man experiences the same thing as the wife: contractions, urinary incontinence, imitation of childbirth, crying, etc.

Where does Kuvad syndrome come from?

In some cultures, it was customary for men to experience the pain of their wife during childbirth. In order to experience all the hardships and hardships of his wife at the time of childbirth, the man lay down, refused to eat and drink, writhed in pain, depicting childbirth. It was believed that this would help a woman to endure childbirth more easily, because. the man takes some of the pain upon himself.

Modern psychologists believe that kuvad syndrome is a kind of experience of a man’s fear for the fate of his woman and unborn child, as well as an awareness of guilt for the pain and suffering that a woman experiences during childbirth.

What to do?

The answer to this question is simple - the patient needs to be treated. Psychologists deal with this issue. The specialist will find out the hidden cause of the syndrome and help the man cope with it. No medicines will save you from a false pregnancy, except for sedatives.

To control "false pregnancy" , a man needs to do the following:

• Sign up for courses for future parents;
• Tell family and friends about your problems as often as possible. If there are none, make an appointment with a psychologist;
• More often to be with a pregnant wife and discuss issues of interest and concern;
• Read specialized literature.

Couvade syndrome is a rather interesting and unusual phenomenon. The main thing - during a false pregnancy, a man should try to remain calm and not to get a pregnant wife, because one inadequate and pregnant woman is enough for one family.

The hypersensitivity of pregnant women to smells has become a common subject for jokes. However, many pregnant women are not laughing when they start to feel sick from the usual smells, for example, from such a native natural smell of a husband. Or from his cologne. What to do?

The appearance of nausea in pregnant women with the appearance of long-familiar odors, experts cannot fully explain. There is an assumption that against the background of the “pregnant” hormonal background, the mucous membranes of the nose swell, which distorts the perception of odors. The psychogenic factor is also not excluded.

Whatever the reasons for the appearance of nausea from the smell, you need to look for ways out of the situation. Unfortunately, scientists have not yet come up with a drug that could help a woman in this situation. There is only one thing left: complete frankness with your husband: if your husband's toilet water suddenly becomes your worst enemy, do not be silent, but let him know about it! The request to wash as often as possible (at least when approaching you) in your position is also completely justified.

Nasal congestion during pregnancy

Nasal congestion during pregnancy is another problem that occurs quite often. The thing is that during pregnancy, swelling of the mucous membrane of the nasal passages and sinuses develops. As a rule, the problem of difficult nasal breathing occurs from the second half of pregnancy. Most women describe signs of nasal congestion similar to those of a runny nose, but there is no discharge from the nose.

Toxicosis ... This word can remind many, many women of such unpleasant phenomena as severe nausea in the morning, intolerance to many odors, dizziness and vomiting. usually appears at the very beginning of pregnancy and lasts the first 8-12 weeks, gradually reducing the manifestations, and disappearing completely by the second trimester.

However, everything does not always go so smoothly: according to statistics, about 8% of all women who have symptoms of toxicosis end up in the hospital because of this condition, it is so difficult to tolerate. At the same time, doctors are still not sure about the exact causes of toxicosis: a woman can be completely healthy in physical and emotional aspects, lead a normal life, and at the same time suffer from bouts of nausea throughout her pregnancy.

Causes of toxicosis in men: the psychology of future parents

Psychologists have long said that such a phenomenon as toxicosis during pregnancy has not only medical, but also emotional reasons. And today this version is confirmed, because paradoxical cases occur - toxicosis affects not only a pregnant woman, but also her husband - this is the so-called male toxicosis.

Cases of treatment of husbands of pregnant women with symptoms, like a drop of water similar to the usual manifestations of toxicosis, occur more and more often. At the same time, doctors cannot find any other explanations, except for the psychological state - the liver of men suffering from toxicosis is in order, there are no problems with the digestive tract, and the food that men eat is quite fresh and cannot cause nausea. Apparently, the psychological effect of “attachment” is triggered when a man is so worried about his half and the unborn child that his body adapts to the body of the future mother. And bouts of dizziness, nausea, and even fainting begin: while men with toxicosis, who by nature tolerate diseases worse, often completely lose their ability to work.

Toxicosis in a man? Calmness and only calmness

How to help the representatives of the stronger sex cope with such an unusual manifestation of unity with the future mother of their joint baby? Traditional remedies against signs of toxicosis in women do not always help men. The main thing that psychologists advise men in this situation is to calm down, stop shifting responsibility for everything that happens and accept the fact of the wife’s pregnancy with a calm confidence that everything will be fine. Then the symptoms of toxicosis in a man will stop by themselves.